...sookay kaast...

One day my mind wandered and I started thinking about what would happen after death. I was thinking about how I have read in the Guru Granth Sahib Ji and heard about and have been taught about what kind of state of mind and attachment to naam and what kind of kirpaa from Vaheguru it really takes for the jot inside of us to coalesce back into the source of its creation. I, in no way, fit that description and am so behind in the kind of naam di kamaayee I think it might take to reach Vaheguru. I started thinking, if I am to return to this world, what are the chances of being blessed with this human body again? I searched “human body” in sikhitothemax and every other shabad is about the preciousness of this life in this body and how difficult it is to obtain this form.

ਗੁਰ ਸੇਵਾ ਤੇ ਭਗਤਿ ਕਮਾਈ ॥ ਤਬ ਇਹ ਮਾਨਸ ਦੇਹੀ ਪਾਈ ॥
ਇਸ ਦੇਹੀ ਕਉ ਸਿਮਰਹਿ ਦੇਵ ॥ਸੋ ਦੇਹੀ ਭਜੁ ਹਰਿ ਕੀ ਸੇਵ ॥੧॥
ਭਜਹੁ ਗੁਬਿੰਦ ਭੂਲਿ ਮਤ ਜਾਹੁ ॥  ਮਾਨਸ ਜਨਮ ਕਾ ਏਹੀ ਲਾਹੁ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
ਜਬ ਲਗੁ ਜਰਾ ਰੋਗੁ ਨਹੀ ਆਇਆ ॥ ਜਬ ਲਗੁ ਕਾਲਿ ਗ੍ਰਸੀ ਨਹੀ ਕਾਇਆ ॥
ਜਬ ਲਗੁ ਬਿਕਲ ਭਈ ਨਹੀ ਬਾਨੀ ॥ ਭਜਿ ਲੇਹਿ ਰੇ ਮਨ ਸਾਰਿਗਪਾਨੀ ॥੨॥
ਅਬ ਨ ਭਜਸਿ ਭਜਸਿ ਕਬ ਭਾਈ ॥ਆਵੈ ਅੰਤੁ ਨ ਭਜਿਆ ਜਾਈ ॥
ਜੋ ਕਿਛੁ ਕਰਹਿ ਸੋਈ ਅਬ ਸਾਰੁ ॥ ਫਿਰਿ ਪਛੁਤਾਹੁ ਨ ਪਾਵਹੁ ਪਾਰੁ ॥੩॥
ਸੋ ਸੇਵਕੁ ਜੋ ਲਾਇਆ ਸੇਵ ॥ ਤਿਨ ਹੀ ਪਾਏ ਨਿਰੰਜਨ ਦੇਵ ॥
ਗੁਰ ਮਿਲਿ ਤਾ ਕੇ ਖੁਲ੍ਹ੍ਹੇ ਕਪਾਟ ॥ ਬਹੁਰਿ ਨ ਆਵੈ ਜੋਨੀ ਬਾਟ ॥੪॥
ਇਹੀ ਤੇਰਾ ਅਉਸਰੁ ਇਹ ਤੇਰੀ ਬਾਰ ॥ ਘਟ ਭੀਤਰਿ ਤੂ ਦੇਖੁ ਬਿਚਾਰਿ ॥
ਕਹਤ ਕਬੀਰੁ ਜੀਤਿ ਕੈ ਹਾਰਿ ॥ ਬਹੁ ਬਿਧਿ ਕਹਿਓ ਪੁਕਾਰਿ ਪੁਕਾਰਿ ॥੫॥੧॥੯॥

gur sayvaa tay bhagat kamaayee || tab ih maanas dayhee paayee ||
iss dayhee kao simrehi dayv || so dayhee bhaj har kee sayv ||1||
bhajhu gobind bhool mat jaahu || maanas janam kaa ayhee laahu ||1||rahaao||
jab lag jaraa rog nahee aayaa || jab lag kaal grasee nahee kaayaa ||
jab lag bikal bhayee nahee baanee || bhaj layhi ray man saarigpaanee ||2||
ab na bhajas bhajas kab bhaayee || aavai ant na bhajiyaa jaayee ||
jo kichh karehi soee ab saar || phir pachhutaahu na paavahu paar ||3||
so sayvak jo laayaa sayv || tin hee paayay niranjan dayv ||
gur mil taa kay khulahay kapaaT || bahur na aavai jonee baaT ||4||
ihee tayraa aosar ih tayree baar || ghaT bheetar too daykh bichaar ||kahat kabeer jeet kai haar || bahu bidh kahio pukaar pukaar ||5||1||9||

Serving the Guru, devotional worship is practiced. Then, this human body is obtained.
Even the gods long for this human body. So vibrate that human body, and think of serving the Lord. ||1||
Vibrate, and meditate on the Lord of the Universe, and never forget Him.  This is the blessed opportunity of this human incarnation. ||1||Pause||
As long as the disease of old age has not come to the body, and as long as death has not come and seized the body,
and as long as your voice has not lost its power, O mortal being, vibrate and meditate on the Lord of the World. ||2||
If you do not vibrate and meditate on Him now, when will you, O Sibling of Destiny? When the end comes, you will not be able to vibrate and meditate on Him.
Whatever you have to do - now is the best time to do it. Otherwise, you shall regret and repent afterwards, and you shall not be carried across to the other side. ||3||
He alone is a servant, whom the Lord enjoins to His service. He alone attains the Immaculate Divine Lord.
Meeting with the Guru, his doors are opened wide, and he does not have to journey again on the path of reincarnation. ||4||
This is your chance, and this is your time. Look deep into your own heart, and reflect on this.
Says Kabeer, you can win or lose. In so many ways, I have proclaimed this out loud. ||5||1||9||

I think that the shabad’s translation—even sikhitothemax status—is pretty self-explanatory. And scary. The time is NOW. How many times must the guru tell us? If not now, then when? It was shabads such as this one that support the idea that the human life is a very, very precious opportunity. But what if we miss the mark? None of us can even comprehend what kind of bhagtee it takes to attain muktee. We are taught that the true liberation is attained while still on this earth, while still in this life. None of us come close to that supersayan-esque bhagat status. If we even think we know what it takes, then that ego-of-thought in and of itself proves that we aren’t there yet. Okay, no pressure. If I fail now, I’ll have to go through only like a zillion other lifetimes until I’m human again, right? And—oh my Vaheguru—what if I’m not Sikh? Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against any other religion—Guru Nanak Dev Ji says: 

ਛਿਅ ਘਰ ਛਿਅ ਗੁਰ ਛਿਅ ਉਪਦੇਸ ॥
ਗੁਰੁ ਗੁਰੁ ਏਕੋ ਵੇਸ ਅਨੇਕ ॥੧॥
ਬਾਬਾ ਜੈ ਘਰਿ ਕਰਤੇ ਕੀਰਤਿ ਹੋਇ ॥
ਸੋ ਘਰੁ ਰਾਖੁ ਵਡਾਈ ਤੋਇ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥

chhia ghar chhia gur chhia updays ||
gur gur ayko vays anayk ||1||
jai ghar kartay keerat hoay ||
so ghar raakh vaDaaee tohi ||1|| rahaao ||

There are six schools of philosophy, six teachers, and six sets of teachings.
But the Teacher of teachers is the One, who appears in so many forms. ||1||
O Baba: that system in which the Praises of the Creator are sung
-follow that system; in it rests true greatness. ||1||Pause||

So yes—you can obtain Vaheguru with other religions, as long as you are on the path of Truth [with a capital “T”]. But as a Sikh, I believe in the universal Truths contained within the Guru Granth Sahib Ji and, understandably, cannot imagine myself on any other path. Anyways, I DIGRESS.

My point is that I had this moment of fear. My tiny peanut-brained consciousness was trying to take on these humongous theological thoughts and it freaked me out. Of course the Divine within me thirsts for reunion with the ultimate Divine. Of course there’s going to be a sense of longing, fear, and hope. These are all conditions of the soul that gurbaanee talks about. As I was thinking all these things, however, the magic of the-right-shabad-at-the-right-time happened. The following began to play on my SikhSangeet app:

ਗਉੜੀ ਬੈਰਾਗਣਿ ਮਹਲਾ ੧ ॥
ਹਰਣੀ ਹੋਵਾ ਬਨਿ ਬਸਾ ਕੰਦ ਮੂਲ ਚੁਣਿ ਖਾਉ ॥
ਗੁਰ ਪਰਸਾਦੀ ਮੇਰਾ ਸਹੁ ਮਿਲੈ ਵਾਰਿ ਵਾਰਿ ਹਉ ਜਾਉ ਜੀਉ ॥੧॥
ਮੈ ਬਨਜਾਰਨਿ ਰਾਮ ਕੀ ॥ ਤੇਰਾ ਨਾਮੁ ਵਖਰੁ ਵਾਪਾਰੁ ਜੀ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
ਕੋਕਿਲ ਹੋਵਾ ਅੰਬਿ ਬਸਾ ਸਹਜਿ ਸਬਦ ਬੀਚਾਰੁ ॥
ਸਹਜਿ ਸੁਭਾਇ ਮੇਰਾ ਸਹੁ ਮਿਲੈ ਦਰਸਨਿ ਰੂਪਿ ਅਪਾਰੁ ॥੨॥
ਮਛੁਲੀ ਹੋਵਾ ਜਲਿ ਬਸਾ ਜੀਅ ਜੰਤ ਸਭਿ ਸਾਰਿ ॥
ਉਰਵਾਰਿ ਪਾਰਿ ਮੇਰਾ ਸਹੁ ਵਸੈ ਹਉ ਮਿਲਉਗੀ ਬਾਹ ਪਸਾਰਿ ॥੩॥
ਨਾਗਨਿ ਹੋਵਾ ਧਰ ਵਸਾ ਸਬਦੁ ਵਸੈ ਭਉ ਜਾਇ ॥
ਨਾਨਕ ਸਦਾ ਸੋਹਾਗਣੀ ਜਿਨ ਜੋਤੀ ਜੋਤਿ ਸਮਾਇ ॥੪॥੨॥੧੯॥

gaurdee bairaagan mahalaa 1 ||
harNee hovaa ban basaa kand mool chuN khaao ||
gur parsaadee mayraa sahu milai vaar vaar hao jaao jeeo ||1||
mai banjaaran raam kee || tayraa naam vakhar vaapaar jee ||1|| rahaao ||
kokil hovaa amb basaa sahaj sabad beechaar ||
sahaj subhaa-ay mayraa sahu milai darsan roop apaar ||2||
machhulee hovaa jal basaa jee-a jant sabh saar ||
ourvaar paar mayraa sahu vasai hao milaogee baah pasaar ||3||
naagan hovaa dhar vasaa sabad vasai bhao jaa-ay ||
naanak sadaa sohaagaNee jin jotee jot samaa-ay ||4|| ||2|| ||19||

Gauree Bairaagan, First Mehl:
What if I were to become a deer, and live in the forest, picking and eating fruits and roots - by Guru’s Grace, I am a sacrifice to my Master. Again and again, I am a sacrifice, a sacrifice. ||1||
I am the shop-keeper of the Lord. Your Name is my merchandise and trade. ||1||Pause||
If I were to become a cuckoo, living in a mango tree, I would still contemplate the Word of the Shabad. I would still meet my Lord and Master, with intuitive ease; the Darshan, the Blessed Vision of His Form, is incomparably beautiful. ||2||
If I were to become a fish, living in the water, I would still remember the Lord, who watches over all beings and creatures. My Husband Lord dwells on this shore, and on the shore beyond; I would still meet Him, and hug Him close in my embrace. ||3||
If I were to become a snake, living in the ground, the Shabad would still dwell in my mind, and my fears would be dispelled. O Nanak, they are forever the happy soul-brides, whose light merges into His Light. ||4||2||19||

“Woah” moment right there. Here I was thinking about how—even though I wouldn’t be conscious of it—it would be possible to think about Vaheguru if I am given a different joon  and the answer was presented by Guru Saahib immediately! The essence inside of us is a direct part of Truth—capital “T”—and has nothing to do with our identity now. Yes, the human life is precious and is the time that we are given to do our naam kamaayee—earn our way to Vaheguru—but that jot never forgets its destination. It never forgets where it came from and never forgets the pain of separation. “Even if I were a fish,” says Guru Naanak, “I would still remember Vaheguru!” It kind of just snapped me out of the fear. I was thinking in terms of how Satinderpal would feel if she came back as a fish or something. But that identity—Satinderpal—doesn’t mean anything. The essence within has no real form, name, shape, identity, color, etc. Guru Naanak Dev Ji says:

ਨਾਨਕ ਮੇਰੁ ਸਰੀਰ ਕਾ ਇਕੁ ਰਥੁ ਇਕੁ ਰਥਵਾਹੁ ॥
ਜੁਗੁ ਜੁਗੁ ਫੇਰਿ ਵਟਾਈਅਹਿ ਗਿਆਨੀ ਬੁਝਹਿ ਤਾਹਿ ॥

naanak mayr sareer kaa ik rath ik rathvaahu ||
jug jug phayr vaTaayeeahi gyaanee bujhahi taahi ||

O Nanak, the soul of the body has one chariot and one charioteer.
In age after age they change; the spiritually wise understand this.

These lines from Aasaa Kee Vaar are part of a greater idea, but it gives you the idea that the soul simply moves form body to body. I think it was this concept that helped me get over the ego of my identity as THIS WOMAN in THIS BODY in THIS LIFETIME and understand that the soul has its own journey. If in this lifetime enough is not done to reach the goal of liberation, yes it may come back as a deer, yes it might be a bird, a fish, or a snake, but that love for the Divine, that longing for reunion never leaves. Vaheguru has given me the blessing of this lifetime to live as a human and contemplate the Guru’s Shabad. I have access to a treasure trove of Truth and Naam in the Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji. I hope we all are bestowed with enough kirpaa  to tap into even a fraction of that blessing in this lifetime and are able to understand even an iota of it.

—June 2011

In remembrance of Guru Jee’s Shaheedee, a poem about Guru Jee’s sacrifice:

Satguru kehaa, “Bachiyo tusi ghareen jaao,
Sees aapnaa dekey Sat bachaavaangaa main,

Hindu mandaraan de bujh rahey deeviyaan andar
Teyl khoon aapney da paavaangaa main.”

Paayaa desh di jardaan andar lahoo apnaa,
Bhaarat varsh da baagh taan phal rehaa hai,

Ajj vi Hindu mandaraan de bujh rahey deeviyaan andar
khoon Tegh Bahaadar da ball rehaa hai.

—Raamnaraayan Dardee

So there’s a beautiful grassy area on campus where I often nap/read/study/chill. Many times we find that where grass grows, more than just grass grows. There are various kinds of random “weeds,” i.e. unwanted plants, that grow among the blades of grass. Many times these weeds have flowers. The little flowering weeds that grow in the grass on which I often lay are very small and unremarkable—to us at least. We don’t really notice them, we walk all over them, lay on them, and it wouldn’t make a difference if they weren’t there at all—to us anyway. They are about the size of the blades themselves and don’t have memorable flowers—not to us at least.

Not to us. To the bees, however, every flower is important. No matter how insignificant we think these flowers are, every single flower gets visited by a bee. The perpetuation of this species of “weeds” has nothing to do with our planting them, watering them, fertilizing them, cultivating them, or replanting them. Everything is simply taken care of. Each flower gets pollinated regardless of its beauty or significance, which are, by the way, relative to the eye of the beholder.

It really made me think of these Gurbaani lines:

ਕਾਹੇ ਰੇ ਮਨ ਚਿਤਵਹਿ ਉਦਮੁ ਜਾ ਆਹਰਿ ਹਰਿ ਜੀਉ ਪਰਿਆ ॥
ਸੈਲ ਪਥਰ ਮਹਿ ਜੰਤ ਉਪਾਏ ਤਾ ਕਾ ਰਿਜਕੁ ਆਗੈ ਕਰਿ ਧਰਿਆ ॥੧॥

kaahey rey man chitvehi udam jaa aahar har jeeo pari-aa ||
sail pathar mehi jant upaa-ey taa kaa rijak aagai kar dhari-aa ||1||

Why, O mind, do you plot and plan, when the Dear Lord Himself provides for your care?
From rocks and stones He created living beings; He places their nourishment before them. ||1||

Every single living creature on this planet has not only been created by Vaheguru, but also has been given the means to sustain itself as well. Do we ever think about this? Nothing and nobody is left out. Every creature has something to keep it going, something to sustain it, something to nourish it, and the means of obtaining the nourishment, too. This interpretation is in the literal sense of sensory/bodily fulfillment. In the following tukks, Guru Saahib delves deeper into how exactly Vaheguru is there for us.

ਮੇਰੇ ਮਾਧਉ ਜੀ ਮਤਮੰਗਤਿ ਮਿਲੇ ਸੁ ਤਰਿਆ ॥
ਗੁਰ ਪਰਸਾਦਿ ਪਰਮ ਪਦੁ ਪਾਇਆ ਸੂਕੇ ਕਾਸਟ ਹਰਿਆ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥

merey maadhao jee satsangat miley su tari-aa ||
gur parsaad param pad paaiaa sookey kaasT hari-aa ||1|| rahaao ||

O my Dear Lord of souls, one who joins the Sat Sangat, the True Congregation, is saved.
By Guru’s Grace, the supreme status is obtained, and the dry wood blossoms forth again in lush greenery. ||1||Pause||

Not only is there sustenance for plants and animals, but there is also sustenance provided for our souls. We have been given the gift of Guru Granth Sahib Jee, we have been shown the path to Naam—the path to Vaheguru. Engaging with satsangat and contemplating on Gurbaani and Naam, the dry, dead wood that is our soul can be turned green again. Vaheguru saves us in ways that go further than physical nourishment. We have been given a means to cultivate our minds and souls as well. Many times when we are thinking about or questioning our own spirituality, we tell ourselves that we are waiting for kirpaa. We tell ourselves that if Vaheguru wanted us to be religious, wanted us to go to gurdwaara, wanted us to do paath, wanted us to keep our hair, or wanted us to take amrit we would. Yes. This is true. But ever hear the joke about the man in the flood waiting for God to grant him a miracle? In a nutshell:

A town is being flooded and everyone tries to escape by any means except for one man. The water gets higher and higher and any time someone tries to save him or help him—with boats or helicopters and ladders—he tells them that he has faith in God and that God will save him. He dies. He then goes to heaven and questions why he was not saved and declares his loss of faith. God straight up tells him that he was sent several boats and a helicopter! God tried!

Anyway—the point is that Vaheguru does have the ultimate power of kirpaa to make us humans do what we’re supposed to do. However, we can’t just wait for a miracle. It takes some sort of conscious effort and commitment from us as well. Don’t believe me? Need the words of someone smarter? Bhai Gurdaas, in the first line of his 111th Kabit Savaeeyaa, says:

ਚਰਨ ਸਰਨਿ ਗੁਰ ਏਕ ਪੈਡਾ ਜਾਇ ਚਲ ਸਤਿਗੁਰ ਕੋਟਿ ਪੈਡਾ ਆਗੇ ਹੋਇ ਲੇਤ ਹੈ ।

charan saran gur ek paiDaa jaae chal satgur koT paiDaa aagey hoe leyt hai |

A disciple who walked one step toward Guru to take refuge and goes with devotion and humility, Guru advances to receive him/her by taking a million steps.

So, my main point was to express my joy and wonderment at how every single flower was tended to with so much love and devotion by the bees regardless of how insignificant the flower is to humans. What we can learn from that is that Vaheguru tends to us in a multiplicity of ways—for mental, spiritual, and physical nourishment and growth. However, despite the fact that we are given all the resources for our nourishment (and the absolute beauty contained within that truth), there is still effort required on our parts to obtain the nourishment that sustains us in all those various ways.

And since the rest of the shabad is related and beautiful and because I love it so much:

ਜਨਨਿ  ਪਿਤਾ ਲੋਕ ਸੁਤ ਬਨਿਤਾ ਕੋਇ ਨ ਕਿਸ ਕੀ ਧਰਿਆ ॥
ਸਿਰਿ ਸਿਰਿ ਰਿਜਕੁ ਸੰਬਾਹੇ ਠਾਕੁਰੁ ਕਾਹੇ ਮਨ ਭਉ ਕਰਿਆ ॥੨॥
ਊਡੇ ਊਡਿ ਆਵੈ ਸੈ ਕੋਸਾ ਤਿਸੁ ਪਾਛੈ ਬਚਰੇ ਛਰਿਆ ॥
ਤਿਨ ਕਵਣੁ ਖਲਾਵੈ ਕਵਣੁ ਚੁਗਾਵੈ ਮਨ ਮਹਿ ਸਿਮਰਨੁ ਕਰਿਆ ॥੩॥

janan pitaa lok sut banitaa koe na kis kee dhari-aa ||
sir sir rijak sambaahey Thaakur kaahey man bhao kari-aa ||2||
ooDey ooD aavai sai kosaa tis paachhai bachrey chhari-aa ||
tin kavaN khalaavai kavaN chugaavai man mehi simran kari-aa||3||

Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.
For each and every person, our Lord and Master provides sustenance. Why are you so afraid, O mind? ||2||
The flamingoes fly hundreds of miles, leaving their young ones behind.
Who feeds them, and who teaches them to feed themselves? Have you ever thought of this in your mind? ||3||

Think about it!